Social distancing ... day 156

Sunday. 

I keep wanting to look back and see what I did and how I made Connor’s last summer home special and think about all the amazing fun things we did. Sadly, that wasn’t the summer we had. Instead we’ve had, well, this one. 

But, I really need to be kinder to myself because; honestly, what I did was:

1) Work from home for three months while helping the children wirh school

2) kiss my oldest/third child goodbye not knowing when I would ever see him again after lockdown, and find a way to trust in a system which has let me down repeatedly before. 

3) run the household while trying my best to support my husband in the most stressful/overworked time in his life. 

4) support caring for my father through a few medical concerns... from a distance.... while missing his bear hugs more than I ever expected. 

5) parent my youngest through mental health crisis after mental health crisis and advocate for meds and therapy and all the things. 

6) love on the kids and help them through countless wave after wave of disappointment 

7) attempt to celebrate birthdays and graduations and special events to the best of our ability. 

8) maintain the strictest ideals of social distancing wile also recognizing when I needed to bend them for.... everyone’s sake 

9) tried my best to help my children understand the changing world around them and tried to Instill in them the importance of using their privilege to help those without. 

10) held my children while they cried and understood when they couldn’t. 

11) sat in the stillness with them. 

12) recognize when decisions needed to be made that weren’t what we had planned. And worked with everyone to get more comfortable with fear and unknown. 

13) found joy and humor in long forgotten games and experiences. 

14) tried to instill in my children the understanding that it’s okay to be afraid and it’s okay not to know but it’s never okay not to communicate. 

15) loved on the children so hard I was in danger of smothering them.

This is uncertain times. The emotions of each and everyday have me constantly second guessing myself. I long for a typical summer and I long for memories of normal things like camping and day trips and the ocean. But I need to remind myself to celebrate all the things we’ve done as a family. We’ve thrived during this time. We’ve gotten closer and we’ve learned how to communicate. We’ve learned things about each other we couldn’t have known before now. 

I’ll always be sad that this final summer couldn’t have been what I wanted it to be, but I’ll give myself permission to celebrate what we had. And what we had was lots and lots and lots of love. 

And also ice cream. 

Social distancing ... day 120

Saturday 

Haircut day! 

Aisling finally was able to hit the salon for a haircut! She looks beautiful! 

Before! 

During! 

After: 

Social distancing.... day 103

Friday 

Another beautiful day at the lake. Today connor and abby drove here to join us. We had a blast with them here. We played a lot of games today and hung out enjoying each other’s company. 

We also took a little adventure to get some ice cream. 

Social distancing enforced and masks required of course. 

Today we also learned that an uncle of mine who had a stroke last week has been moved to hospice care. It’s terrible to think that our family, and my dad especially, won’t have an opportunity today good bye as they would under normal circumstances. I hope that the family is able to find some way to celebrate his life and have closure even among this pandemic. 

Social distancing .... day 94

Tuesday 

Tuesday was the last day of school for the girls. What a strange year. We did the usual end of school photos. Connor has been done for a while but he’s always up for pictures. :)

Final day of grade six 

Final day of grade ten:

And a bored child who’s been done for a while:

Siobhans sixth grade class had a “field trip”. A bunch of families went to the drive in movies. It was a great time! It was a little nerve wracking to be in a public space for the first time in a while and it was a little nerve wracking to open our bubble up a little. But it was a blast. We saw the movie ET. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen that movie! The kids got a kick out of how old it was. Of course we had to eat reces pieces. :)

It was very cold as the sun went down but we had a great time. 

Social distancing.... day 93

Monday. 

Today was the last day for students in Lowell. I still have a few more meetings but it’s going to slow way down. 

Connor continues to be bored. Today he and siobahn starting working on switching rooms. It’s going to be a slow process. Kind of unsettling to begin though. It makes it more real that he’s leaving. 

Before, during, and after. Strange that it’s all just in a box. 

Al and aisling and I were able to take a walk after dinner. It’s been a little while so that was nice. Overall a decent day today. 

Social distancing .... day 85

Sunday 

Siobhan was able to go to Sophie’s house for the day. That was... kind of amazing. She and I have been side by side since March and she hasn’t seen any friends. I’m so glad she was able to see her!

Al and I did a lot of yard work, and i helped aisling film her recital video. 

We then went to another protest tonight. We need to keep showing up until things change. 

Social distancing... day 84

Saturday. 

Today was a pretty good day. The pollen count is through the roof! But other than that things were good. 

We had a great Girl Scout meeting today where we had a paint session! I had a friend lead us in painting the same scene. It was loads of fun and helped us all to feel connected. 

It’s things like that which help us to all feel connected. 

We also ate dinner from a new place tonight. We tried milk city barbecue. We’re trying to support more black owned businesses. 

I can’t complain when it tastes so good. 

Have a great Saturday everyone. 

Social distancing ... day 81

Wednesday 

Seems like I skipped Tuesday. 

Honestly, things have been rough around here. Trying to balance showing up for social justice but also not dying in a pandemic. It’s a lot. 

I did a lot of donating yesterday. Black lives matter, joe Biden, the bail fund, and any McGrath who’s running against Mitch McConnal. We’ll see. 

On Tuesday Connor has his ceremony to pick up his cap and gown. Ordinarily I’m told this is a barbecue for the students. Sadly they clearly didn’t have that. But they did have a drive through parade. It was special in its own way. I was emotional of course. 

When we got home connor and Siobhan played a game. It’s weird that Connor doesn’t have anything to do during the day! 

We did get works that in the fall he should be able to be on campus for classes. That’s so exciting and incredibly nerve wracking. 

Siobhan used her quill and Ink as well for a little project. 

On Wednesday i worked for a very long day. Lots going on to finish the school year. 

While I was at work sam attacked the chipmunks living under the umbrella. I don’t know how he’s capable of such destruction. 

Aisling and i did get a quick walk in today. 

Thankfully we went out before it down poured!

I left siobhan alone for a few minutes and came back to this. 

She’s ridiculous. 

Have a good Thursday.